The Dangers of Over-Parenting
Over-Parenting...it's a term many of us are unfamiliar with, but ignorance will not be a benefit to your children. Recently some college students were unable to "function" academically without their parents because their parents helped them so much during their earlier school years that they became dependent on them.
Julie Lythcott-Haims former dean of freshmen at Stanford University and author of the book “How to Raise An Adult.” tells us...
How you know if you are overparenting?
Lythcott-Haims says, says it manifests itself in three ways, the overprotective parent, the over-directive parent and the concierge.
The overprotective parent feels “they have to prepare the road for their child, rather than prepare their child for the road,” she says.
The over-directive parent, or “tiger mom or dad,” makes their love for feel conditional, based on how well their child executes the plans the parent has for their lives.
And the concierge wants to be their child’s best friend. This parent handles everything for their child, tracking deadlines, bringing forgotten items to school, making phone calls on their child’s behalf. This parent makes sure everything goes smoothly in their child’s life at all times.
It's important we remember, Lythcott-Haims says, that our job as a parent is to work ourselves out of a job.
“A little bit of struggle, a little bit of hardship actually makes humans stronger. Why would we not offer that experience to our kids?”